How to Cope With Loneliness?
Have you locked yourself in and don’t know how to cope with loneliness? It’s high time you opened to people. Start acting right now!
Every person had some moments in his life, when he felt lonely. This feeling could last for several months or years, it could happen in the noisy crowd of people.
In the real world we are surrounded by people all the time – at least by the colleagues from work, neighbours and we meet the passing by people on our way every day.
Loneliness is a special form of worry and treating yourself as if you were abandoned, alienated, lost, deprived, wasted and desolate.
So, how to cope with loneliness, when it prevents you from enjoying life? Let’s try to clear it out.
Types of loneliness
Loneliness as a rest.
It’s clear and there is nothing bad about it.
We live in the screaming, noisy, densely populated world, where every one of us needs some minutes of rest and silence to cope with everything what is going on.
Somebody from the classics wrote that loneliness is a wonderful thing, but only in case there is someone you can tell about it.
Loneliness as a rest is also a possibility to pull yourself together and concentrate on something…
Loneliness as a tragedy, which a person often, and even most of the time, creates on his own.
The world works the way that if you give your hand to others, sooner or later somebody will definitely shake it.
However, if you don’t give your hand – then nobody will know how much you want to shake hands with others.
When a person closes in on his own, in a certain moment he starts suffering from lack of energy, which he must receive from others.
Reasons for loneliness
Laziness and selfishness.
Any relations, whether family or friendly, are the same work.
If you are too lazy to build them, there is nothing weird you are lonely.
You must sacrifice your interests sometimes, cope with difficulties by making concessions to each other and remember that it’s not only for you, but for both of you.
Selectiveness in communication.
There is no need to communicate with just anybody, but searching too thoroughly for the drawbacks is senseless either.
Nobody is perfect and you should put up with the drawbacks of the near.
A person can be kind, unconflictive and interesting, but unpresentable appearance will ruin all impression.
Assertiveness in relationships.
When a person tries to cope with loneliness with all mighty, it frightens the people, who surround him.
Negative traits of character.
They are aggression, cruelty, tedium, hysterics, being a squabble and other traits of character, which can spoil others’ lives.
You are to learn how to eliminate these drawbacks.
12 useful pieces of advice how to cope with loneliness
Surely, when you cope with such condition you must use those methods, which are quite suitable to a certain situation you have.
If you acknowledged and expressed your feeling of loneliness, you have definitely succeeded in discovering how they appear. These are the things you must cope with and get rid of.
Our pieces of advice may be suitable for you. Try to implement them in your situation; similar actions helped plenty of people.
That’s what you can do to cope with loneliness:
Focus on the present.
Every time melancholy starts to seize you, say to yourself “Stop! I won’t think about it anymore!”
Transfer all your attention to the things, which are going on today. You cannot go back to the school years and become the School Queen again.
Nobody can return to the past! That’s why look for the other abilities to cope with your life and be happy today and tomorrow.
Be yourself. Moreover, be proud of yourself.
Yes, you are not a celebrity that half of the world knows and all paparazzi try to catch on their cameras.
Neither you are a person who is living in the three-stored mansion and chooses cars according to the lipstick color.
You belong not to the whole world, but only to yourself – and it is wonderful!
You are a unique personality and there is no person alike in the entire Universe.
So, stay happy and proud to be the kind of person that you are.
Learn how to enjoy time you spend alone with yourself.
After you’ve learnt how to be comfortable alone, you’ll cope with the obsessive need of communication with others.
So that you liked loneliness, get used to the long walks in the park or along the bank of the river or seashore.
Think only about something pleasant during the strolls.
In order to cope with loneliness do not allow yourself doing nothing.
When your mind is not busy with anything, many unnecessary thoughts start coming to your head and you have to cope with them.
If you have free time, go for a walk, ride a bicycle, or read a good book.
Make sure you find something exciting to do and don’t be afraid to try something completely new.
When you acquire new experience, you become a more interesting personality and more people will reach for you.
Besides, if you start attending various clubs, you are sure to make new friends, who have the same interests you do. As a result, your communication circle will broaden a lot.
Figure out the aim of your life and always reach for the activities, which are targeted on the solution of your tasks and problems.
When you know your life has a definite important purpose, the support and encouragement of other people lose their value.
It’s much more difficult to feel the meaninglessness of your life (which many lonely people experience), if you have a vision of your future target!
Try to be helpful to others.
Start volunteering, for example.
Helping those, who are even in a worse situation than you, will bring you great benefit.
You are sure to understand how happy you actually are, because you don’t have such terrible problems unlike those people, whose lives you are trying to make easier.
An additional bonus from such activity is that volunteers are usually talkative and friendly people and you’ll definitely find many new true friends among them.
Find a notebook, which you haven’t touched for so long and call your old friends and acquaintances.
Our life has so much routine, the events replace themselves so quickly, that this fuss is gradually separating people.
You will be surprised how much you’ll enjoy hearing the old friend.
Believe us, she will be happy to hear your voice not less.
You’ll have one more path, which will lead you to the world of human communication.
Lest you feel lonely, spend more time with your family.
Nothing strengthens the faith in us more than love of our parents!
You can sit home in a tight family circle or you may go together on an event somewhere.
There you can meet new people. Understanding you are not alone among unfamiliar people will help you to cope with the feeling of awkwardness, which often happens when people introduce themselves in the public places.
Test yourself by taking the initiative in the social relationships.
Do not wait till people start talking to you; come closer on your own.
If the situation allows, ask the man, who interests you, whether he would like to talk to you on the topic, which is interesting for both of you.
You must show your interest to others and they will express their interest towards you. Do not expect to find a new friend at once in the moment you met him.
It may be a long and laborious process, but it will lead to real friendship.
Work on self-improvement.
Start going to the reading room or learn how to paddle on a kayak, take the lessons to learn how to play some musical instruments, learn how to speak a foreign language or how to do a belly dance.
New knowledge and skills will broaden your worldview and attract more people to you.
Be physically active.
Go for a walk regularly, go in for yoga, visit gym or learn how to swim or ride a bicycle.
You will not just improve your health and figure.
More than that, you will receive a great amount of endorphin (the so-called hormones of happiness), which are created by our organism during the physical load and help a lot to cope with stresses and depressions.
Listen to the merry and lively music more often.
Find the songs and tunes, which make your mood fly, as if on wings.
Turn in on the full volume, dance and sing – let the music play inside you!
All in all, try to concentrate not on the negative anxiety, but on the way how you can cope with loneliness.
Remember that loneliness is a feeling, which is born in your soul. This is an inner condition, so you are able to change it!
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