Do you ask yourself how to be a good parent to your child? Here you are going to find 8 pieces of advice, which are sure to help you.
When planning and bearing a baby a question always arises – how to become a good parent?
This intention is admirable. Nevertheless, don’t try to be a perfect parent. There are simply no such parents in the world.
Babies come this world without any covering instructions how to be raised.
It makes the process of up-bringing interesting, and at the same time brings to the life of the fathers and mothers many disturbing questions.
Am I correct and do everything in a right way? Do I act reasonably in relation to my children? Am I a good example to follow?
All these questions torture any parent, who treats his duty seriously. Many articles and books have been read, many approaches have been learnt: from the carrot to the stick, just in order to find the right method of up-bringing.
There are several important moments, which are likely to help you become really good parents. You must work hard on yourself.
Tips, explaining how to be a good parent
1. Respect your kid and his point of view.
Modern teenagers come to the world of adult with the feeling of self-esteem. Treat your kids and teenagers as adults. Communicate with them as with the equal, but don’t entrust them to the adult duties.
Patiently answer all childish how and why. Provide with a good explanation of everything new and unexpected they may come across.
Be a good parent and create space and time for children to express their own opinion and make decisions. Don’t forget to give some options to choose even to the small kids.
Respect them just as much as you show how you respect your parents, friends and other close people.
Be gentle with them.
Remember that children can’t stand, when they are spoken to in a haughty manner.
Respecting your kid you show him how to respect others.
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2. Give way to the child’s gifts and talents.
Every baby is born with the set of skills, developing which good parents can find gifts and define kid’s talents.
Kind’s talent is the unity of inborn qualities and surrounding’s influence as well as family atmosphere. A talent can be developed, but it may be wasted, too.
Scientists have defined the needed conditions for the child’s life, which show how to turn the skills into a talent: warm family relations, trust, love and interest of the adults to the life of their kid.
The latter is the most significant: genuine and sincere interest to everything a kid is doing and is learning about.
Noticing what is interesting for an offspring and what attracts it is one of the main targets of a good parent.
Praising, assisting and supporting son’s or daughter’s initiatives means that a good parent is creating the breeding ground for the development.
Helping your kid to develop his talents, you are likely to accustom him to the art and teach how to create the world around.
3. Listen to the child and hear what he says and understand it.
To understand and take the feelings of another person is a huge tension for the moral forces.
Listen to the kid attentively; keep the pauses before you start lecturing and admonishing him.
Learn how to create the space, where the kid could come to the conclusions on his own.
Be interested in the conversation.
Turn to the children with the pressing requests and constructive proposals. Keep the voice emotionally warm and encouraging.
You can develop kids only during the live and interesting communication.
By listening and understanding your offspring, you are going to form a healthy emotional need for human communication.
4. Settle conflicts by reconciliation and forgiveness.
All children demand constant involvement and good care, attention, much time, encouragement and wise guidance by the adults.
Difficulties of growing up experience not only parents, but children as well. Conflicts and misunderstanding are the good platform, where they can be taught the lessons of life and love.
Help your sons and daughters to cope with the conflicts and understand the feelings and needs of all parties involved.
Teach them how to take into consideration the interests of others. Be the model of reconciliation in arguments and discords.
Admit when you are wrong and ask kids for their forgiveness.
Settling conflicts fairly and with love, you teach how to be not afraid of the difficulties in the future.
5. Express your love and gratitude.
Children, raised in the atmosphere of love and care, grow happy and replete. There can’t be too much love.
Give them wise love, avoid emptiness in relations with them. Often say how much you love and are happy to be together.
Express your sincere love and devote your time without any conditions or limits.
Hug them and smile. Be grateful to your son or daughter for his or her presence in your life.
Convincing children in the sincerity of love, you’ll raise a person, who will give warmth and happiness to the people.
6. Create the age limits of the personal space.
Everybody needs the space, where he feels relatively secured.
It’s important for a kid to have some space to grow and develop.
A parent must know how to differentiate the moments in the children’s life, when they need the broadening of the personal space.
Do not keep the kid in babyhood, but help him to grow up. Don’t have the total control over his life, but try to trust the pattern of maturation.
Being deprived of the personal space a person loses himself, lives not his life and loses his personality.
Let the kid have the personal space in his childhood and create the conditions for the success in the adult life.
7. Sacrifice wisely for the sake of your child, and learn how to love yourself.
Happy children are known to be raised by happy parents.
Take good care of yourself and your needs, when you are in the prime of parental life. Sacrifices and limits are needed only in moderate amount.
Mothers, who sacrificed their interests for the sake of the baby, will bring up the ones, who will know how to play only victims in life situations.
Remember – you don’t sacrifice your life, but present the years of your life to your own descendants.
Do not demand the awards from children, when they grow up. Make some concessions only with the light and open intention to be together on every age stage.
8. Do not repose the unjustified hopes in the child.
There is a great difference whether you want to raise a responsible and mature personality or make a perfect person according to the way how you imagine perfection.
You shouldn’t demand from a kid to be a high achiever or the star in the football team; just say how good at studies he is and praise for sports achievements and let him make efforts according to the abilities.
If a teenager sees you expect only best results, he may feel that he will never be good enough, fit them and due to this even rebel in the process.
You mustn’t be a person, who triggers fear because of the feeling that you’ll never be satisfied. Become a supporting team to a son or a daughter, but never turn into a drilling commander.
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Warnings how to be a good parent
Never excessively pamper your child.
It may lead to his being stubborn and irresponsible behavior.
Do not be afraid to be a parent.
Make everything possible to be a friend, but don’t let him forget that you are a parent and not a partner.
- When you praise a kids, focus on his efforts, but not results, so that they don’t get used to fish for compliments.
Do not stop taking good care of kids even when they grow up.
Being a good parent is a life-long thing.
However, remember that adult children have their own lives: they know how to make their own decisions and answer for the consequences.
Try not to follow strictly according to the stereotypes of the parental behavior, which are accustomed in your culture, race, ethnic group, family or dictated by other social factors.
Please, don’t believe that there is only one true way how to raise a baby.
Do not diminish the importance of children’s friends and their choice.
Moreover, try to maintain the good relations with your friends.
Never criticize the kid’s friends.
He may think you don’t like them.
Be always good and open to those he is on friendly terms with.
- Don’t say how bad you behaved yourself in the past, because they’ll start comparing (or even imitating you): “See, daddy, you were just like me!”
This way, parents’ job, just like any other one, may have mistakes, doubts, temporary failures, victories, which take turns with defeats. Good upbringing in the family is the same as life and our behavior and feelings are complicated, changeable and contradictory to the children.
Asking yourself how to be a good parent, know that there are no true answers. Besides, parents, who know all and everything, are likely to fail in fulfilling one major parents’ aim – cultivate the need to the independent search and cognition of the new things.
Enough amount of parents’ care help to bring up and become a good parent. A child must feel not only loved, but realize that parents value him as a unique personality, and both parents find it significant to build good relations with him.
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